Have you broken up with your husband or boyfriend? If so, you may be asking yourself what you can do to get him back. Every woman hates enduring a break up: the crying, pigging out, feeling so miserable that you think you ll stay that way for ever and not caring what you look like. However, there are things you can do if you want to win back your ex. Here are five tips that can help you.
1. Don t Leave Angry Phone Messages
This tip applies to ranting phone calls, emails and text messages. Even if you re seriously tempted to leave this kind of message because you think he deserves it, don t. If you want to get back together with him, doing this kind of thing can seriously ruin your chances of reconciliation.
Don t demean yourself in this way. Yes, the break up hurts a lot. And you may want him to know how much you re hurting, but communicating with him in this way is only going to make you look like an angry, scary woman. And who wants to make up with someone like that?
2. Don t Make Him Jealous
You may be thinking that if you could make him jealous, you may be able to win him back. It s natural to think this way, but trying to make your ex jealous could seriously backfire.
If he sees you out with another guy just after you ve broken up, he will probably feel hurt, angry and betrayed. He might try to even up the score by going out with another woman or more than one!
So if you don t want that to happen, then stop thinking about making him jealous. There are other, better ways to win him back.
3. Don t Sabotage Yourself
Following on from the above tips, it s important that you don t sabotage your chances of getting him back.
It s normal to feel depressed after a break up, but there comes a time when you have to start picking yourself up, even if you don t feel like it. Otherwise, you re going to be sitting on the sofa with greasy hair, wearing a ratty old bathrobe and slippers and eating chocolates for days or weeks on end.
Thinking depressing or negative thoughts is NOT what you do if you want to get him back. Instead, try to think positively not just about him, but about your life in general. If you can think of one thing you have to be grateful for every day even if it s just having a roof over your head and food in your pantry, then you may find it easier to think positively once more.
4. Be Friends With Him
If you want to keep the lines of communication open, then try to be friends with him. I don t mean to be his best friend, but even though it may be hard for you if you re still devastated by the split, keeping things friendly after a break up can give you a better chance of winning him back when you re ready.
Your friendship may even grow and evolve over time until it becomes obvious that you both want to try again.
So even if it hurts at first to see him after the break up, try to remain friendly while at the same time being cool, calm and collected. If you act like a lady, he may realize what he s given up.
5. Keep Yourself Looking Good
It s important that you keep yourself looking good not just for his sake in case you accidentally bump into him in the street but for your sake as well.
Taking care with your appearance will help make you feel good, even if your heart is still reeling from the break up.
It can be hard at first to care what you look like when you ve split up with your boyfriend or husband, but it s vital that you keep yourself looking good if you want to be in a more positive frame of mind.
And when you re feeling positive, that positivity can reach out and touch other people. People want to be around positive people a lot more than they want to be around negative people.
And if you re friends with your ex and you re looking good, he s sure to notice and may even realize what a fool he s been!
If you apply the above five tips to your situation, you may be able to handle this break up a lot better than previous ones. If you want to get him back, keep your dignity, take pride in your appearance and remain friends with him. Once you re ready to try again with him, you may be surprised at how receptive he is to getting back together.
Article submitted on behalf of co author Bob Grant.
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